The Abduction of Soft Paws
by The Real Chys Lattes
Summary: Iruka was having a bad day. This is the drunken yet well-meaning end result. (Someone asked for fluff, does this count? A writing prompt from the DoS forum started this...) Updated with a chapter 2, KakaIru.
1. Chapter 1

**_Disclaimer: Naruto is not mine, its Masashi Kishi-troll-motos._**

 ** _This can take place in canon, but it started on the DoS forum as Haha21's Writing Prompt: "3. Anyone sneaking into the Inuzuka/Hatake households for puppies. Because fluffballs are always adorable. Even on bad days."_**

 ** _"The Abduction of Soft Paws"_**

Kakashi Hatake was being kept busy, having been asked to go and spar with Kotetsu and Izumo simultaneously, a bit of an exercise. He figured he would humor them, as the two of them wanted to improve their skills.

That was the set-up. They were the distraction. Perfect. If it wasn't for Kakashi's thorough preparation for the unexpected they would have had it done sooner. A one minute job turned into an hour-long excursion. They were really testing their time limit here.

Traps, traps and more traps. There were traps on the windows, keeping anyone from even looking in. The blinds had paper tags on them. There were curtains too, with seals that dropped Kunai on your head.

There were hidden mechanisms on the doors hinges, keeping people from opening them properly. Well, unless you wanted to trigger a small explosion.

He had traps on his refrigerator. That eggplant was definitely safe, if anyone came-a-calling. (No one was coming for that eggplant. The ninja was _paranoid_. It was the only thing in the fridge. One. Lone. _Eggplant_. With a BITE out of it.) There wasn't even any food in the (Trapped! TRAPPED!) Cupboards. Seriously.

How the hell did Kakashi ever get into his own apartment on a good day anyway? It was almost like he didn't really live there. (Theories abounded from years prior that he was like a monkey and just lived in the trees around Konoha, reading his books. That was usually where people went to find him, after all.) There was barely any furniture to speak of. Just a bedside table and headboard cubbyhole with a plant affectionately named Mr. Ukki, and a bed with shuriken print bedspread. Oh, and a few pictures on the walls, for color. If you liked cool colors, lots of blues and greys.

Nearly impossible to surpass traps aside, the goal was clear. They had to get inside. They were men on a mission. (Well, not a real mission but still... this was A-rank difficulty.)

Genma bit the senbon in his lips out of habit, hiccuping slightly. He was crouched uncomfortably, hands on his knees, watching as his partner worked furiously to remove the traps they'd stumbled into.

Raido grimaced and wiped sweat from his brow as he pulled apart another trap they had almost missed, built into the floor boards. It almost took his leg off. Neither man dared to move while the scarred man worked.

Oh, why were these two breaking in to Kakashi _freaking_ Hatake's apartment? Well... they had a good reason... a fair excuse... Because... because Iruka was having a bad day.

And damn it all, those paws were fabled for being able to lighten any mood. It was all Hatake ever talked about at the bar, in such a fond manner they all believed it to be true. There was just no questioning it. The awe in the man's voice was enough to convince even the Hokage that such paws were feasibly a healing comfort. (She'd once asked him to go to the hospital to make a few ill children feel better. And. It. Worked.)

Bad mission? Relax with a puppy and soft paws. Soft, pink, paws. Able to lift any spirits. Surpassing any expectation.

He sometimes offered to summon his dog for them, but they were all, every last chunin and jounin, always too manly to accept. But then... Iruka-sensei. Friend of every Konoha ninja that passed through the mission room... they had to do _Something_ to make him feel better! (And they just were not breaking down and ASKING. Easier and more acceptable to 'borrow' and then say 'sorry, man dunno what came over me.' Nope. Ninjas. Go figure.)

Trap taken care of, Raido signaled the all clear to move forward.

They tip-toed into the apartment, and saw him. Right there. Target sighted: code name: "Soft Paws." Snoozing on the bed. He didn't even wake when Genma gently picked him up, patting him on the head, as Genma was a trusted and familiar scent. He snuffled, and curled his nose into the man's flack jacket affectionately, those fabled paws twitching in his sleep as he dreamed.

Yes. ' _Target acquired,_ ' Genma signaled in the dark, arms cradling his charge delicately. Raido's scarred face split wide into a smile. Now he had to put all the traps back up. The smile fell from his face with a grimace. But...

Soft. Paws. Tiny little puppy paws. That translates to 'Happy' if all things go well.

Mission: _**"The abduction of soft paws."**_ complete.

Yes. That was the only solution.

They may later admit to being a bit drunk about it, after a few sad rounds of beer with the depressed teacher. They couldn't even remember what set it off, and why he was depressed? Something about a student leaving for far too long.

Who could blame them? (Apparently the Anbu who uses wood style that tracked them down... because he saw two drunk idiots breaking into the jounin apartment complex, only to leave them tied up in wooden shackles with some knock-out tags on their foreheads, both dropped off on Anko's doorstep late at night...) Eh, details.

Suffice to say, they never made it to T + I, as there was really no reason to, with such high levels of absurdity at work. And honestly, it was for Iruka. Even Yamato couldn't blame them.

Anko, however, was a different matter. She cackled, demanding something in exchange for their freedom. Kotetsu and Izumo ended up paying the ransom.

In dango. For days.

She let them go, one at a time, when her demands were finally met.

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...

Iruka stepped into his bedroom, hiccuping, and wandered over to the bed. He tossed his kunai holster on the bedside table, and simply plopped down to sleep. A gruff sounding Yelp startled him into jumping back up as he realized he had landed on something soft, and pointy in places. Looking down at his bed, he realized he had sat on Pakkun.

Pakkun frowned in the darkness. He didn't know how he had gotten here, either. He smelled Genma, alcohol, and a fair bit of stupidity at work.

Why was Pakkun on this bed? He raised his little doggy eyebrows in curiosity.

Squinting at the dog in the dark, the teacher leaned down and stared the dog in the eye.

The dog, sniffing him, intuitively knew something was wrong. He sighed and raised one of his tiny little paws in greeting. "Hey. Bad day?"

"Ah. Yes." his voice cracked a bit when the cause of his sadness came back to haunt him. He was really missing his favorite student, and worried over him obsessively.

"You want to touch my paw pad? This will make it all better!" the adorable little dog offered, waving said paw pad in front of the chunin's confused face.

Deciding _'What the hell, why not?_ ' Iruka climbed into bed, with a puppy on his chest, content to pet the soft pink paw pads until sleep overtook them. It was the best dream he had had all week, and he awoke feeling much better afterwards.

He noticed when he awoke that Kakashi was sitting on his windowsill, silently reading a familiar orange book. The silver haired man looked down on him with a smiling eye.

"You could have just asked." The jounin said nonchalantly as Iruka looked up at him, blinking bleary-sleep-filled eyes through the glimmering sunshine filtering in behind Kakashi's back, as shadows of a waving tree branch danced up and down along the window.

" _Woof_." Pakkun grumbled, hiding his face in Iruka's pillow. Iruka gave him a grateful smile and smothered the puppy in a warm hug.

.

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...

 _ **Author's Note: This is what I do when I'm procrastinating- I browse the forum and end up writing something other than what I intended to write. *sigh* But in this case, I kinda like it. Someone had asked for fluff. Does this count? (Goes back to writing the next chapter of 'Dreaming of Death Note' now...)  
**_


	2. Chapter 2

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The abduction of soft paws 2.

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They (being Kotetsu, Izumo, Genma and Raido) were still pondering it. Because based on their drunken excursion, it was quite clear: Kakashi Hatake did not live at home.

Either he really was a monkey living in the trees around Konoha, or he was living a double life and had an apartment elsewhere, was somehow back in anbu after his team dispersed and had no record of his housing there, or the most interesting possibility- Hatake could have been cohabitating with someone else.

All bets were on the last possibility. It was, after all, the most fun version.

Now who was he with?

Everyone who entered into the betting pool was instantly negated as a possibility for obvious reasons. (But they're ninjas. They still look at each other with a discerning suspicion- the bet could have been placed to throw others off their game and hide the truth! Others contributing to the bet were Anko and Gai, Ibiki and Aoba, and even Ebisu, but even they didn't know where Kakashi was spending all of his time, according to them.)

There was one individual that everyone in on the speculation agreed would know the answer, aside from Kakashi himself. He, of course, lived with the man, after all: Pakkun.

The group decided they'd ask the little dog who Kakashi was rooming with. Problem was they couldn't find the elusive Jounin's summoned nin-dog. Anywhere. The dog was usually in Konoha proper, so not being able to find him? It was quite disturbing. A large group of competent Konoha ranking ninjas couldn't find a tiny little dog. It was rather embarrassing, actually. They had genin working on D-Ranks that would have done better than this. (And some of them were pondering the possibility of hiring them to do just that, actually. Lazy, jounin, lazy.)

They'd managed to steal the cute, soft pawed little mutt just a week ago, right out from under Hatake's nose. It was quite an operation, and there were some drawbacks, but the smile on Iruka-sensei's face the very next day was well worth the trouble, toil and sweat, (and resulting Dango debt and humiliation from Anko-san,) required to accomplish it. Why were they having such difficulties now?

Kakashi was in town, they'd seen him that morning at the book store. His team was in town (sans Naruto who was out training with Jiraya, and of course, the Uchiha... well, nothing to say about that...) but Kakashi wasn't out on a mission. So the dog should have been around, somewhere. He was simply nowhere to be found.

This just wouldn't do. They had to find that dog!

"This sucks, man. Where do you go to find a dog?" Genma groused as he and Izumo wandered down the streets, munching on some dango.

"The Inuzukas might know, if it's a dog you're after," said a passing genin kunoichi who had overheard the question and who (they were pretty certain) was named 'Sakura'. She was the one the Hokage was currently training to be a medic, so they'd seen her often at the Hokage tower.

"Good idea. We should check there," Izumo nodded.

The pink haired girl smiled and continued on her way, carrying what appeared to be a shopping bag full of medicinal herbs.

"Wasn't that one of Kakashi's students?" Genma asked offhandedly as he watched her leave. He bit into his senbon, clenching it between his teeth.

Izumo pondered that, staring at her as she headed down the road, "I think so... but I doubt that she'd actually know anything. He's pretty secretive."

"You're right. Silly thought," they dismissed that possibility as being too blatantly obvious. No point in asking the girl where her sensei usually resided. He'd have chosen a meeting place for them, and kept his home private.

They met up with Kotetsu and Raido a few minutes later, outside a popular tea house.

"Ya know, there's another thing that bothers me..." Kotetsu was saying as Izumo and Genma showed up.

Raido asked, nodding in the newcomer's direction, "Yeah...?" They joined up and formed a half circle to jump in on the conversation.

Kotetsu continued, "I remember the plan for you guys to go in and steal the dog. Izumo and I were distracting Kakashi at the time... I remember you told us about the traps and things... but... I don't remember actually getting the dog into Iruka-sensei's apartment. After Yamato caught you... Well, Izumo and I didn't take him there. I wasn't that drunk or I'd have remembered that."

"You know... Raido, I don't remember what happened either. I was carrying the dog... but the next minute, Yamato had me trussed up like a turkey for the roast. I just... no. After the knockout tags, I have nothing." Genma blinked at everyone, admitting this odd tidbit, and a little surprised at himself for doing so. "Unless you count waking up to a snickering Anko-san as something worth mentioning. Doesn't help us figure that part out, though."

"I too, have no real memory of how we managed to pull that one off." Raido nodded, "I can't recall getting the dog to Iruka's place at all. Genma and I just didn't make it past Yamato."

"Wasn't me." Izumo shrugged. "I was with Kotetsu the entire time, helping distract Kakashi. We even had to take him out for a few drinks after our spar because time was running short."

"Yeah, we ended up buying him a few rounds." Kotetsu recalled, staring up at the sky. "That emptied my pockets."

Izumo denied, "I know I didn't get plastered." he glanced at his friend, "Because we were awake the whole night, and I know what happened then. I don't think I've forgotten anything at all. We just didn't have custody of the target. That was all you guys."

"Yup," one of them agreed.

Genma looked ashamed, "This is kinda awkward."

"We know Iruka received Soft Paws... so how did that actually happen?" Raido sighed.

The four men stood around contemplating this oddity.

They didn't notice the imperceptibly snickering anbu melting into the woodwork behind them.

The anbu reformed on the other side of the wall, to meet the gaze of a single eye from over the top of a familiar orange book. "So, what are our friends up to?" Kakashi asked quietly.

"Pondering the impossibility of them having completed their self-appointed mission to make Iruka-kun happy." Yamato smirked, "All while realizing they never actually completed the mission. I swear, they're a little oblivious at times. If I hadn't have brought Pakkun to Iruka-kun, then all of their hard work would have been for nothing. Honestly, I took some pity on them."

Kakashi shrugged, "I got a few drinks out of the bargain, and a good exercise. I'd say it was time well spent."

"Hah, you thought Iruka-kun took Pakkun on his own, didn't you?" Yamato wagged his brows at the other jounin.

"Well, I did sort of tell him all he had to do was ask." the one-eyed jounin smiled, with just the curve of that one visible eye. Yamato was amused at the fact he could tell the difference between his eye-smiles and a simple long blink, having known the man so long. Most people never really noticed how often the mysterious jounin usually did smile, which was actually quite often.

"You've been spending a lot of time with him, as a result. You're never over at my place anymore," the brown haired man pretended to pout. He'd actually been enjoying the peace and quiet, and a bit of solitude never hurt anyone. Everyone needed it from time to time, even though with Kakashi it was usually the opposite- he sought out social interactions on a daily basis... even if others didn't always know he was, well... following them. He could be a bit odd about it, but it was his way of coping with loneliness. Yamato had learned to just humor him and let him in. (And never, ever, believe a word he said when he pretended he was actually late; he knew damn well he'd been there all along.)

"What can I say? I like him."

"Heh, ok then." Yamato laughed. He glanced at the wall, wondering who would win the bet between the curious ninjas outside. It didn't matter, in the end, as Kakashi would either keep them in the dark, or humor them. Pondering their skill levels, he figured it would probably be either Raido or Ibiki who figured Kakashi out, eventually. Gai was a close third, but he was a little too close to Kakashi, and the man tended to be well guarded around his closest companions. (Yamato could attest to that.) "So, when you sparred with them, how were they?" Yamato asked, taking a seat at the table in the tea house.

"Hm. They've been improving noticeably." Kakashi put his book down and took a seat as well. "Kept me on my toes."

The atmosphere in this room was informal, and more like a typical restaurant than a standard tea house, and the woman that came in to serve them was about as informal as she could get, with her hair hanging down over her shoulders in loose strands and black curls, stains on her apron from leaning on the counter dusted with powdered teas that morning, even chewing bubble gum as she took their order. "We have a new tea from the land of Ogres! It's popular today. They say the priestess there uses it when she meditates. She can see the future, you know! That must be some good meditation. Dunno if that means there's something in it or what, but it's selling well. People say it's pretty good. Haven't tried it myself," she suggested, poised with a pencil in hand, ready to write down their order. She smacked her gum as she eyed Kakashi's silver hair.

"Sure, why not." Yamato grinned, "I'd like something new. And for the food portion, surprise me, then." Kakashi, apparently, wanted the same. The waitress smiled, took their order, and headed off, whistling.

"Oh? You're in a good mood!" Kakashi smirked at his friend, wondering why.

"Yes, I am, Senpai. Since I bought last time, now it's your turn to pay for the meal!" he said with one of his-genuine-but-still-quite-creepy smiles. Kakashi blinked, and suddenly remembered he had left the oven on. Yamato didn't buy the excuse, but couldn't stop him from vanishing in a swirl of leaves. It was the same excuse he'd used for being late to their first meeting, that day.

"Where the hell do you always disappear to?" Yamato glowered at the empty seat, but the empty seat didn't respond. "Oh, right."

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Iruka sat on his couch, grading papers he'd brought home with him. As he placed the last paper on the growing 'complete' pile, a rustling at the window made him look up. Kakashi always made a bit of noise when entering, if he saw the light was on, so as not to startle Iruka.

"Oh, there you are! Where do you always go to, anyways? You missed dinner." Iruka admonished, "I put some away in the fridge for you."

"Hm, thanks. I was out having tea with a friend. You know Yamato, right?"

"Hm... yes, I think you introduced us before." Iruka nodded.

He gave him a smile with his eye, "Yes, I did."

"Shoes, Kakashi." Iruka somehow managed to give him a friendly smile while simultaneously glaring, a blush on his cheeks. (He shouldn't always have to remind a jounin as if he were an academy student! Honestly. It was embarrassing. He had students that were better behaved, Naruto included!)

"Right, right!" he headed to the front door of the apartment to deposit his shoes in the genkan. (Iruka was always so picky! He'd even taken to leaving a pair of guest slippers at the window Kakashi had claimed as an entryway.)

Glancing into the bedroom as he headed towards the front of the apartment, Kakashi noticed Bull, along with several of his other summoned nin-dogs, all asleep in a pile on Iruka's bed. Bull, though silent throughout the day, was snoring the loudest. It would most likely be a struggle to actually get any sleep with that puppy pile, since reaching the blankets to even get under them was probably mission impossible at this point. It was a good thing Iruka had a spare room, as the dogs had claimed that one for themselves.

Kakashi gave Pakkun a pat on the head as he passed him, sound asleep in his own brand new doggy bed (with the paw print design on the little pillows which Iruka picked out for him) next to the door to Iruka's bedroom. Pakkun snuffled in his sleep, wiggling his tiny, soft paws.

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 **Author's Note:** Per usual with my shorter fics and one-shots, this fic is complete as is. If I get a wild hare like I did here and add more, that's just how it is. Absolutely no guarantee of more, so it's listed as complete. Though I really liked the idea of expanding on this after thinking about it for a while. XD


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